Graduation Tassel

my graduation tassel looks like an ear of corn.
It’s bad enough they stick genetics and biology into the “College of Agriculture and Life Sciences” (where they stand out as the sole lonely vanguards of real science in a field littered with majors such as “agricultural journalism”)… but do they have to complete the humiliation by making us wear a tassel that looks like we plucked it out of a nearby farm field…!!?
I was so sad when I saw it, I almost cried. Then, in a stroke of brilliance, I remembered that my third major is in the “College of Letters and Science”. I could technicallygo to that commencement ceremony instead! *AH-HA!!!* “Let me see the L&S tassels!” I exclaimed to the perlexed young lady behind the desk – “STAT…!” (I’ve been watching too much E.R….)
But alas, as god hates me, it turns out the only tassel worse than CALS’s is….. the bright, gaudy as hell, high-school-marching-band-yellow of L&S. The choices – go to graduation with what looks like an ear of corn dangling off my head, or else go looking like I should have a trombone ready to bust out some pep rally tunes at a moment’s notice……
I guess corn isn’t that reprehensible of a vegetable……
11:16 pm

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