Workplace Hijinks

Yes folks, it’s finals time again. Which means procrastination of the inevitable studying by any and all means neccessary, including, but not limited to goofing off, excessive drinking, obsessive checking of e-mail (when writing term papers) and arm wrestling.
The latter, it seems, was in full force today as we here at the Las Vegas Grande Hotel and Casino proudly bring you tonight’s championship match-up between Steph “The Intimidator” and Joe “The Calculator” (a hastily picked moniker designed to gently mock the fact that he’s voluntarily a math major). Let’s meet our competitors:
First up, weighing in at 140 (emo) pounds, we have Joe “The Calculator”…! Seen here either attempting to psyche out his opponent, or else passing a kidney stone, Joe stands tantamount as the reigning arm wrestling champion of the DoIT infolab, mainly by virtue of the fact that we didn’t have a champion before, and Joe seems as good a pick as any to start out with. Joe is also a really really smart math major, which leads me to fear for his safety at the hands of . . .
The lovely, the talented, the roughneck Steph “The Intimidator”!!! (goodness, could i pick a lamer moniker? I’m sorry, steph, joe) Ms. Steph enjoys moonlight walks by the beach, romantic dinners, picking broccoli out of her teeth, as well as kicking your sorry ass at arm wrestling. She is a Chem E major with penchant for heavy drinking, and a steel shank she carved out of a bed post during her time in Leavenworth.
Are you all ready….? Then leeeeeetttt’sssss get ready to ruuuuuuuummmmbbbllleeee!
Truely a stunning match. You had to be there, folks. The excitment of competition. The thrill of glorious victory. The agony of infamous defeat…! (so ends my less than promising career as a sportscaster. It’s official – I simply do not know enough played-out cliches’ and catch-phrases. *sigh*)
To end the suspense (mainly cuz’ i should go do my homework rather than wasting time blogging), Joe won. His victory was not without tremendous cost, however…..
The definition of a “Phyric Victory”. Here Joe demonstrates for the camera (whilst mugging for sympathy) the wound sustained to his thumb while valiantly forcing Steph into ignominious submission. Don’t worry Joe! The random computer-lab-arm-wrestling-fan in the background (don’t we all look silly when we’re caught of guard and someone takes our picture? I know I do….) would probably be more than happy to kiss it make it feel better. Or something like that. I’m babbling now.
Time to go do homework. For the record, we’re going to the Essenhaus tonight around 9′ish. So any and all who wish to join, please feel free. For whatever reason, I have the sneaking suspicion that I’m not going to make it to my last ever class in college tommorrow….
Now listening to: “Bone Thugz n’ Harmony – 1st of the Month” (*old school track!* – I wish I could be on welfare so i would have something cool to rap about…)
7:51 pm

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